Welcome ICLW

ICLW stands for International Comment Leaving Week, and it is something I used to participate in pretty regularly when I was writing on my other blog. Basically, it is a way for people who have/are affected by infertility to network. You can learn more about it here. I stopped participating for a few different reasons, but decided I wanted to give it one more try this month. Funny that this would be the month that my family would actually end up being affected by a pregnancy loss.

Anyway, if you are visiting my blog because of ICLW, welcome! Here is a little snapshot of me, my experiences with IF, and my family:

We started TTC in December 2008 and I was able to get pregnant immediately. Unfortunately, I ended up having a miscarriage at about 10 weeks. Fast forward to spring 2010 with no real success, and I decided to see an RE. I was pretty quickly diagnosed with a chromosome inversion, and my husband and I decided to pursue adoption. We were blessed with a very quick wait to adopt, and we welcomed Jaxson into our family in November 2010. After a month or so, I noticed that I wasn't feeling too well, and was surprised to get a BFP when Jaxson was only six weeks old! We welcomed our daughter, Aynsley, into the family in September 2011. Jaxson and Aynsley are only 10 months apart in age. Since that time, we are taking a break from TTC, and I am sure that we will wait quite a while before looking for baby #3. Right now I am just enjoying my role as mommy to these two sweet kids!

PAIL

I recently came across PAIL: Parenting After Infertility and Loss, and I am so glad that I did! Prior to Aynsley being born, but especially prior to adopting Jaxson, I did a lot of infertility blogging. Although I chose not to share those posts with anyone I knew in real life, I found that blogging and networking with complete strangers was such a support to me, because these people knew exactly how I was feeling. After Aynsley's birth, I started to drift away from the infertility blogging community because even though I could relate to how others were feeling, most of them couldn't relate to me. Plus, what infertile girl wants to read about someone's two kids, even if they have dealt with infertility?

I realize that right now, our family does not look like the poster child for infertility. Unfortunately, I will always be infertile, and I know that it will plague me again the next time we are ready to welcome another child into our home. I have come to realize that the pain of infertility never completely fades, or if it does, it takes a really long time. It is different now; instead of longing for a child, it presents in other ways...wishing that I could perfectly space out the time between kids, sadness when I see someone complaining about their pregnancy.

So, back to PAIL. PAIL is a list of blogs that are written by people who now are parenting after infertility. I was so happy to recognize many of the people that I used to follow when I was writing on my infertility blog. I am really looking forward to getting in touch with some of these ladies again.

As an added bonus, this week is National Infertility Awareness Week.  I would encourage everyone to take just a minute and learn a little more about infertility. Did you know that infertility affects an average of 1 in 8 couples? Chances are, you know someone besides me that has been affected by it.

I don't mean to get on my soapbox, but this is an issue that has affected me and is dear to my heart. Thanks for listening to my ramblings. :)

Tell PETA: Infertility is Not a Joke

I realize that most of the people who read this blog have not had to deal with infertility, but PETA's current campaign made me so upset that I had to share. You can also check out these websites/posts: From IF to When and Hannah Wept Sarah Laughed.

PETA is currently running a campaign where if you get your animal spayed/neutered, you can win a vasectomy. While this in and of itself might not be so bad, they are advertising that they are doing this in celebration of National Infertility Awareness Week, which is occuring later this month! Their website advertises:

"...It's a two-fer: Get your animal companion fixed, and get yourself fixed too! Human overpopulation is crowding out animal life on the planet, and dog and cat overpopulation is creating a euthanasia crisis that is a crying shame. Disappearing wilderness, vanishing water resources, and pollution is the price that future generations will pay for more human births, while losing their lives is the price that millions of homeless dogs and cats pay when guardians neglect to "fix" their companion animals.

"Every year in the U.S., an estimated 6 to 8 million lost, abandoned, or unwanted dogs and cats enter animal shelters. The best way to combat the companion-animal overpopulation crisis is to have your cat or dog neutered. And with a global population of almost 7 billion humans, more of our species could use a (voluntary) snip too.

"Now, one lucky man can be reproduction-free, free of charge, just like his pooch or feline friend. In honor of National Infertility Awareness Week (April 24 to 30), PETA will give one free vasectomy to a man who has recently had his companion cat or dog neutered..."

I'm sorry, but how does this honor infertility and the hundreds of thousands of people worldwide who are suffering from this disease? Infertility is definitely not a disease that people choose to deal with, and it offends me that it would be treated this way and that PETA thinks they can honor it by letting someone win a vasectomy. Isn't getting a vasectomy the OPPOSITE thing that most people with infertility want??? I am sure that PETA wouldn't chose to target other diseases in a similar manner in an effort to "control the population". Maybe I am over-reacting, but I really do find this to be shameful and insensitive. I would encourage anyone who finds this offensive to SIGN THIS PETITION or e-mail PETA directly at ingridn@peta.org.

Just the Same

I saw this poem in April's Ensign and LOVED it, so I thought I would share it here:

Just the Same
By Diana Lynn Lacey

Sometimes—
God sends rain
Straight from the sky
To nourish the young flower
and it grows.

Sometimes—
God sends rain from the sky
To the mountaintops,
Then over hills and through valleys
Until it reaches the flower and it grows,
just the same.

Sometimes—
God sends a child
Straight from His realm
Into a mother’s arms
and love grows.

Sometimes—
God sends a child
From heaven to another’s arms,
Then over hills and through valleys
Until he reaches the arms of his mother
and love grows, just the same.

Blog Challenge, Day 22

I am going to try and get back on this bandwagon...I am SO close to being done!

Today's challenge is to post about a website. I thought a lot about which website to share...I considered some of my favorite craft ones, or maybe a cooking one. In the end, I decided to post about Stirrup Queens. I stumbled across Stirrup Queens about a year or so ago, and it has been an emotional life saver. Basically, it is a website for all things related to infertility, pregnancy loss, and adoption. It has connected me with so many other women that have similar experiences. There are message boards, informational columns, support boards, and my favorite, ICLW (basically a time once a month for concentrated blogging). I would highly recommend this website to anyone who has experienced anything related to infertility or who is just trying to get a better understanding of what it is all about.