Monthly Theme: How to Feed a Baby

Over at PAIL, there is a monthly theme where other bloggers are encouraged to write about their experiences with the assigned topic. Since PAIL is all about parenting after infertility, the topics typically have to do with parenting, kids, etc. This month's theme is about experiences with feeding your baby/child. This is an interesting topic for me because I feel like I have been in a unique position to experience different sides of the feeding debate.

When I first dreamed of motherhood, I pictured breastfeeding as the only logical choice, never really imaginging that it could be difficult, let alone not be an option. In most situations, adopting a child poses some restrictions on baby feeding, and we were no exception. But, I have to say, I was not disappointed in using formula for Jaxson. Yes, it is more expensive, but I really enjoyed it. It was so helpful to be able to allow other people to help feed him, especially when it was Mike's turn to get up with him in the night. It was nice to be able to leave him with a babysitter and not have to worry about being home in time for a feeding. I don't feel like Jaxson experienced any kind of disadvantage at all because he received formula instead of breastmilk.

When I was pregnant with Aynsley, I received more than one lecture on how nice it was that I would now be able to breastfeed my baby instead of resorting to formula. I was told all about how terrible formula is and how amazing breastfeeding is, albeit hard and painful. People explained that breastfeeding your baby is what makes you a real mom. When Aynsley was born, we tried breastfeeding. A lot. The poor girl started losing too much weight in the hospital, and we were forced to give her a bottle. Despite visits with a lactation nurse and a lot of attempts, she still struggled. I am sure that part of this could have been the fact that she had acid reflux AND I was also trying to care for her 10 month old brother while trying to feed her, but she struggled getting enough unless it came from the bottle. We finally concluded that it would be better for our daughter's health if all of her meals came from the bottle. I ended up doing about 50% formula and 50% breastmilk (that I pumped), and it worked out really well for her. I still enjoyed the convenience of her having a bottle and she was able to get some breastmilk. And do you know what? She did just fine, even though she also had formula in her diet.

This whole experience really taught me the importance of respecting other mom's preferences in how they care for their kids. For some women, breastfeeding is the only way to go, and it works great for them. For others, there are different reasons why it doesn't work out. And that is perfectly okay. What matters most is whatever is working for baby and mom, and not for someone else.